DigitalSportsDesk.com's - 10 Stages of Bargaining

Popular author Dan Jenkins' legacy will surely be his insightful listing of the "Stages of Drunkenness" made famous by its prominent position behind the bar at an old New York City watering hole, called "Runyons."  The list went like this:

1. Witty and charming 

2. Rich and powerful 

3. Philosophical 

4. Against the SST (later amended to against the DH)

5. F#@& dinner

6. Witty and Charming, Part II 

7. For the SST (for the Designated Hitter)

8. Morose and despondent 

9. Invisible 

10. Bulletproof 

When the famed Runyons watering hole fell victim to slow times and bickering ownership, the list, which should have been etched in stone, was no longer in the public eye.  However, it was later edited by Jenkins and included in his book, Baja Oklahoma.  Here is the modified version:

1. Witty and Charming

2. Rich and Powerful

3. Benevolent

4. Clairvoyant

5. F#@& Dinner

6. Patriotic

7. Crank up the Enola Gay

8. Witty and Charming, Part II

9. Invisible

10. Bulletproof

In these times of labor strife, uncertainty, layoffs and the potential for complete annihilation of NBA basketball, the stakes are very high and the progress is very slow.  The situation needs description. So I give you, the "Ten Stages of Bargaining."

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